Category: Dating and Relationships
So, I am just curious has anyone else ran across a certain person/people on here you talk to off line who tell you they enjoy getting to spend every minute with you? However, when it comes down to it you are the one doing the majority of the messaging, and the majority of the calling? Then when they perhaps tell you how much they can never get enough of you at the beginning of the phone call after twenty minutes the phone call may come to an abrupt end? Or do you ever encounter calling this person having a great conversation with them, and then all of a sudden they get another call on call waiting? Then they come back saying a friend needs them badly for some stupid reason? However, any time you call, and they are on the phone they NEVER click over for your phone calls? Sorry just had to know if anyone else feels like they have a player placing them on the back burner while trying to buter them up with false flattery. Thanks for any comments you are willing to share with me on this topic.
I've run into many people on here who are inconsiderate. They chat with you and just log out without warning. Or they send a note, you reply, and they disappear. But not what you are experiencing. Just drop the prick. People who do not treat you with respect aren't worth your time.
Oh I know how players are in this day and age. Just wondering if anyone hears these
exact same words spewed from treacherous lips as well.
Oh, Pasco. I'm afraid I've been guilty of the QN dropping, you bring up, a few times, without meaning to be rude; I'm sorry if I'm one of this careless bunch! Sometimes I get caught up in reading boards and forget I had a chat going, so close the window. Or have computer freezes, or some such.
I wishthe Zone had an easier voice chat option, because text chat seems really impersonal to me, I struggle with it, and I often wouldn't mind chatting, but have trouble knowing what to say, without a voice to put a name to. I'm not much on small talk in person either, so it's more an introvert problem, than lack of interest on my part.
However, sounds like the op here is trying to discuss a particular person. I have no idea who this is, thank goodness.
I am referring to a particular person; however I'm sure there's more guilty of doing the
same thing. Plus I liked your response because on here I think I've been guilty of the
same problem. So, this topic opened up other forms of communication where people drop
the ball of communication unintentionally with social media.
A couple of things here:
Some people do in fact say they're more interested than they are. Sometimes it's because they don't know how to let you down easily. Sometimes it's because they truly think they're more interested than they actually turn out to be. Sometimes they're just jerks, too. I've seen this happen before, but it's not horribly common, in my own experience at least. Speaking for myself, I try never, ever to do this to people. If I'm telling you I'm interested, I damn well am. I'm not going to pretend to like you, or make a show of enjoying time spent with you, if I don't like you. I have issues, but that's not one of them.
One caution, though. Heather, your criticisms look kind of pointed, and since you've had at least one other topic where you passively blasted your ex in public, in my eyes at least you're developing a bit of a reputation as someone who airs dirty laundry a bit. It's kind of uncomfortable to read when it's this pointed, and I can only imagine what it might be like if your target read it. Maybe you figure you're entitled to it, and that your target's feelings no longer matter since they've done this to you. Okay, fine, I guess. But just bear in mind that some people tend to shy away from this sort of behaviour. You might make your problem even worse, because fewer people will want to associate with someone who will air their grievances in public this way if things go south. My suggestion is that if you've got a beef with a particular user or users, talk to your friends about it instead of doing it like this on a public board. That, or there's always graffiti, where you're anonymous. Just a bit of friendly advice. Excoriating someone in public is very rarely a good idea.
Nope, never had that happen, but I have had it where people passive
aggressively whine about stuff they should have gotten over in middle school on
the boards. That's fuckin' annoying, I can tell you.
I must say, Gregg and Cody have said it best here.
No, not here, but then I don't really speak to anyone here, off here, if that makes sense?
Now, as to quick notes, I understand exactly what happens sometimes like post4 stated.
Also, sometimes, I personally will be multi tasking, so not actually on the Zone page for a bit, and when I do come back, it night be 5, 10 minutes, so whoever has noted me as given up.
I will try to send them a private mail message saying what happened if the page wasn't refreshed by accident.
The telephone might ring in my house as well, and I have to cover that.
If I was really interested in talking to them, I let them know it in some way.
If you are experiencing the type of behavior you state, that should tell you the person really isn't as interested in you as they said, so you write it off, and find someone else that is.
If you take every failed relationship to heart, you waste much time brooding.
Especially when the relationship hasn't really gotten off the ground, you need to take the hint that the person just isn't as interested as they thought, or said.
I think people tend to feel they need to say a relationship is really hot at the beginning because of that "connection" thing, when it really isn't.
It is almost like something you are required to do, or it isn't real.
Well, it isn't.
So, take it with a spoon of sugar, and move on.
Remember, you are special. Don't allow these small things to bother you.
You, as Cody stated, should have past that stage.
Last, I'll correct something a bit.
When I do speak to anyone off here, we've really established mutual interest.
If not, it just remains an online deal.
Maybe that would help.
Simply don't exchange numbers, or personal email until you have learned of the level of interest.
I'm sorry it looked like I was pointing fingers at one individual, but it wasn't just about
one person . Look I know Cody dislikes me, and enjoys ripping into me at any chance;
however Greg I was not intending this post to hurt anyone. I was hoping to have females
come forward with similar experiences to discuss the issue. However, I got lectured by
someone I would NEVER place in this category, and berated by a rich Peter Pan man.
Because if it should be left in junior high school, so should have Cody's attitude with The
Lord of the Flies.o
I agree with Wayne. Exchanging personal phone numbers and email addresses is best saved until a genuine friendship is in the making or at least until you have established common interests to talk about.
So wait, this wasn't about one individual person? So you were lying in post five
when you specifically said this was about one person?
Didn't lie Richie rich unlike you I don't get the luxury of caffeine, and when I get tired, and
in major physical pain I mess up what I'm typing then. I meant to say it wasn't about one
person. Please stop berating me Cody. I know you have nothing better to do with your
time then tear others down to size, but unlike you I don't have lots of money from my
mommy and daddy, and actually have problems you can't conceive for some reason.
You're stressing me out by targeting me, and unlike you I know I'm not God, and don't
have the energy to waste on someone like yourself.
Right, I'm sure that the incredibly passive aggressive, paragraphs long tirade
was about no body in particular. You just had a thought while you were in the
shower and thought you'd post it. And you thought, on a whim, you'd like it like
a heartbroken seventh grader, even using the phrase "treacherous lips." All on
the spur of the moment, cuz that's how most people write when they're
discussing incredibly specific references. That's very believable.
Look, its ok that this was about some guy. considering that you've been
complaining about guys every time I've seen you on here for days now, I would
be shocked if you didn't make a post like this. So don't bullshit us. wE all know
you were bitching about one guy.
Look money bags go hit up mommy and daddy for a new shiny toy, so you can get your
egotistical off me. You're messing with things you know nothing about you power hungry,
feminist hating, ignorant chauvinist male swine what I say except for this one single post
does have to do with one specific person. If you had a heart cocky shit for brains you'd
empathize with others pain. However, you're so stuck on yourself, and your God complex
to ever feel anyone else's pain. You think you're so high and mighty because you're a
white male with money. Take away all those things, and then you just might have to face
the reality of the real world. Ever seen or read Beastly oh supreme one? If not get ready
for a real war because watching you become stripped of your superiority complex is going
to make me bubble with laughter. Now to set the record straight Scrooge I've had guys on
and offline tell me these things. Not just one man has played me. So, get your facts
straight Dick because you're going to lose everything, and you can believe or not believe
it, but I've already done the same thing to someone else in the last two years. Should
have kept your big, biased mouth shut when it came to me. Here's a tip save every penny
mommy and daddy give you.
This post was targeted at one particular person because if it were not the case, you wouldn't put that one situation out here. If I were you, I would have used several examples or something else to prove your point. Oh, and I agree with Greg... Finally, every woman has been there, done that, but there comes a time in life where you don't create boards like this.
Me and someone else on this site were played by the same game, and we fought it out in publics, but doing this? Nah, and I was 14-15 then...
Awwww look another defiant diva of the mommy and daddy funds!!! How cute making fun
of me for your boy toy Cody!!! Just because you think you're superior doesn't make you
so Lakeria. Let me make it clear for the mommy twins who only have to focus snap their
fingers, and get their demands. I don't give a fuck what any egotistical, narcissistic, self
absorbed moron thinks of me here. You talk about getting college degrees, but explain to
me how do you do that when you're on the zone all the time? What do you have a GPA
less than a 3.0? Again people who try to put me down it's not working because I know if
we dissected you all we'd get is a sorry pile of hearts. Sorry bitches sticks and stones can
break my bones, but none of you will be the end of me, and that's a fact I well know. So
keep smiling even when the sun is't shining.
Well, Heather, you've just shot nearly all your credibility to hell.
You don't know me, so you don't have any ammo to toss at me, but I'm just gonna go ahead and support what others have said. You've just cemented everything I suggested about you in my previous post, and then some.
And here's the thing. I don't care much. But now there is absolutely no doubt what you are.
When you are corrected, resisted or otherwise opposed, you resort to personal attacks that have absolutely no bearing on the arguments presented. This is either insecurity, lack of intellect or both. I'm going to give you one shred of the benefit of the doubt and suggest it's very likely insecurity.
Your phrasing in earlier posts means this was very very likely targeted more at one person than not. You wanted other females to come forward in solidarity with you, for one thing. And for another, very specific language was utilized. Quick question for ya then: what if males had come forward in solidarity with you? Because certainly you can understand that women, too, are sometimes jerks, and sometimes pretend interest when they don't feel it, or don't know what their true interest is. Guys aren't the only ones who do what you've outlined.
I'm highlighting this point to demonstrate that the only one holding anything close to a sexist opinion here, Heather, is you.
Now look. Please don't respond to this with venom. It will be the equivalent of trying to poison a rock. You can't hurt me. You can't make me angry. You can't insult me in any meaningful way.
If you mistyped, and your point was about many people but specifically incited by one person, then okay fine. But my other points stand unchallenged. There are better ways to phrase this sort of grievance, and better forums in which to do it. Better yet, there are much, much better uses of your time than attacking Cody and Lakeria that way. Any credibility you might once have had has taken a lot of damage in so doing.
I agree with Greg, with the additional facet of the fact that it was really fun to
watch you scramble to throw the first insults that came to mind at me. Even if
you have no idea if they're even appropriate in the situation, you still threw
them just to lash out. Thanks for letting me know I was correct in thinking that
you have the maturity of a six year old.
Greg I actually respect your opinion. I think you are an open minded person. I've never
thought of myself as sexist, but you have a point. I've been hurt so many times I've
forgotten all the man eaters. I'm sorry Greg, and I won't let it happen again. I hope you'll
look past this incident.
As for you Cody get a real life, grow up, and stop trying to provoke me. Because I'm like
Evie Green I hate turning into the red witch, but you've been making snide comments at
me for almost four years. Push me a little farther Cody, and you'll get a taste of poison.
Don't you have a job Cody? You're always talking shit about blind people who should have
jobs, and how certain people should have their kids taken away with your home girl
Lakeria. Go talk about some more people behind their backs with Lakeria while those
people can't defend themselves. "We all know the chest and toys the petty girls and pretty
boys make up the face to win the race"
Oh dear lord, you're in your thirties, and you're still using book characters as
your inspiration. You really think I'm scared of some phrase you thought
sounded good in a fantasy novel? Here's a hint. If you want people to stop
pointing out that you're acting like a child, or a bitch in some instances, stop
acting that way. stop whining, stop putting up passive aggressive posts, stop
quoting YA novels at people, just act like you actually are the age listed on your
profile. Unless that was a typo too.
Heather, I accept the apology regarding your sexist comment, and am glad you're viewing me with at least something of an open mind even when I'm in disagreement with you.
I'd stop engaging with Cody if I were you though. He's clearly making you upset - please don't try and say that he's not, because your reactions are just too clear-cut - and you appear to be one of those people who flails and tries to posture when you're defensive. God knows you aren't the only one who does this, but it's not a particularly good trait to have.
As a relative outsider, some of your reactions have just made me cringe on your behalf. I advise that when something makes you upset, walk away from it first. Give yourself time to remember a few things, then ask yourself if you want to post or not. Here are the things you should ask yourself, in my opinion at least:
1. Is my post a personal attack, and if so, is the personal attack relevant to the situation?
2. Is my desired reaction passive-aggressive, or do I have a legitimate reason to be angry and a legitimate way to voice my anger?
3. Am I listening to the point being made, or am I reacting to the way the point was made and ignoring everything else?
Sometimes, if you're upset, these things are hard to sort out from each other. You might write in the heat of the moment and only later realize that you've misspoken or overstepped yourself. Problem is, you really can't undo that here on the zone; silly comments will stand for all time, and only once they're forgotten and allowed to die undignified deaths will you get a better chance to prove that you're better than your bad decisions.
One question I asked above really takes front and center here. If someone makes a point in a way that insults, upsets or otherwise distracts you, it is your responsibility to try and recognize that, but it is the other person's responsibility to understand that as well. The issue with Cody in this case, and Lakeria to a lesser extent, is that I don't think they give a damn how they come across when addressing you. As such, they aren't trying to tailor their responses so that you understand or will give them a fair hearing. As such, they hit all your buttons and make you enraged enough to flail, which amuses Cody, at the least (I won't speak for Lakeria here). Personally, I don't like it when people do this (I don't like either side, I mean). It bugs the shit out of me. By contrast, I'm giving you personal advice and even some pretty sharp criticism, but I'm trying to do it in a way that you'll process. If you learn from this, then I'm satisfied. And I do not mean to come across as smug, either, but as someone who's been called arrogant by a few over my lifetime, I know what it is to be accused of shutting people down and/or not considering how they feel.
For me, at least, I care more about getting you to see and hopefully accept my point than I do about proving you wrong or hurting/upsetting you.
Sorry for yet another protracted ramble. I'm good at those.
I'll give one more piece of practical advice regarding people who profess more interest than they show. Put them on the hot seat.
Seriously. Just ask them, when you get a chance. Point it out straight. Don't snipe. Don't snarl. Just ask, pretty much point-blank, something like this:
"So, I don't know what's going on here. You say you're interested in talking to me and all that, but you're always getting out of calls, and seemingly making excuses not to talk. Maybe I'm misreading things, but it's happened a lot in the last while, and I'm really starting to wonder if you're leading me on here. Care to give your side of it?"
This is a little pointed, but not outright rude. If the person really does have a legitimate explanation, you're giving them the chance to voice it. If they didn't - and in pattern-behaviour cases they probably don't - then your bullshit detector is probably going to go off right away, and you can make a decision on your future plans in pretty short order.
Some people will tell you that most of these social cues are obvious. They're right more often than not. But in the event that you're getting mixed signals, communication is key. Even if it feels a little awkward to do so, the best thing you can do is just put your suspicions right out on the table for the other person to see. Voice your issues, and see what happens.
Right, so what exactly have you proved Heather sweetheart? And it's ok, calm down...do you need me to call your mommy to give you a lollipop to help with these reactions that didn't have anything to do with what this board was originally about?
Finally, our point was clearly proven, and yes, I am on the zone during the day, but at least I'm not on here creating board posts about a guy who has a fake interest in me... and I fucking wonder why... lol
Thanks Greg for the advice. You're great at giving advice. I'll be more wise in the future.
Because you're completely correct it's sometimes better to take the moral high ground,
and I do learn from my mistakes. It just saddens me because it seems men are more
devoted to trying to be open about things. It really doesn't bother me though because I
don't get sad from not getting to have caffeine, or sad because I'm not miss popular. What
bothers me is I'm dead serious when I talk about the ability to destroy people's lives. It
saddens me how people call out others behavior, but refuse to examine their own lack of
maturity. Oh well I will remain silent about my own problems, but if I get pushed any
farther from cyber bullying my dark side is being let go of her leash. I will make things
happen unaccording to plans.
And that, heather, is exactly my point.
You just did it again. It was a little better than past posts, I'll grant you, but again with the passive aggressive stuff.
If you're over it, then say nothing. If it bothers you, then vent your anger or do whatever you need to do. But don't say you're okay with things, claim you're going to take the moral high ground, and then snipe. People are usually pretty wise to this tactic, and they'll call you out on it just as I'm doing.
Also, let's set one thing straight here.
Let's assume, just for a moment, that everything you said about Cody is true. It's not, but let's just pretend it is for a moment.
Cody came in here and basically seconded what I had said, though he went a bit farther than I did. He called out your passive aggression. You responded by attacking Cody, rather than dealing with the point he tried to raise. Okay, so he maybe rubbed your fur pretty vigorously the wrong way, but you got totally distracted by your opinion of Cody, and actually sorta validated his point. You ignored it in favour of a personal attack.
This would be sort of like you going to a restaurant, having someone screw up your order a bit, then realizing you actually know the owner and then yelling at him because he screwed you out of forty bucks a year ago, all in response to the fact that your order got screwed up. Sorry, but they don't match.
If you're upset at the point Cody made, refute it, prove him wrong or, better yet, go away a little while and think about it. Don't just attack him. You're just conflating issues and getting things all fucked up for no good reason.
You're doing the same for Lakeria, albeit with a little less venom.
Now, neither Cody nor Lakeria is doing you any favours, since they're being pretty aggressive here (Cody more than Lakeria), but past a certain point, people aren't obligated to be nice. I care about trying to straighten this out. Those two might not. If I stop caring, I will go away and stop responding rather than attack you. Or, at worst, I might send you a private message and really and truly tell you what I think, if I'm that angry. But I won't mock you in public. If you don't want this to become an even bigger drama bomb than it already has, please, Heather, consider your words, and if you really do want to take the moral high ground, then just bloody well take it. Don't take it, and then undermine yourself entirely by making half-threats and taking shots at the people you're trying to claim ascendency over. That's a great deal like saying "I don't care about the last word, but..." and then getting the last word anyway. It's childish, it's going to get you a reputation you won't be able to shake, and while I don't know enough of the details of your interpersonal relationships to be sure of this, I daresay it will do you damage on a person-to-person level.
Speaking personally, and with no specific desire to hurt you, I wouldn't stick around a person demonstrating some of these traits any longer than I could manage. Doing it on a board is nice and impersonal. But the thought of getting to know you is frankly repugnant to me, and that's why. I see that sort of drama, the passive aggressiveness, the attempts to take moral high ground undermined by personal attacks, and I want to bolt in the other direction. You will be a better person, a better friend, and a much less likely target for people to abandon you or otherwise let you down if you cut this shit out.
What would make me a better person is to not give a damn what you think of me. I have
had every right to say what I said, and if you don't like it, and don't want to be my friend
don't let the door hit you. I'm not going to be berated for voicing opinions. They may not
be all informed opinions; however I'm just as good as anyone else on here, and have the
right to say what I want to say. I will refrain from the board post topics, but I refuse to be
a target to be bullied on here. When the darkness comes out you nor Cody or Lakeria will
know it. I promise the three of you can have my silence. If provoked I won't say a word
I'll just let the part of myself who can be alien come out to of me to play. I am not
something broken to be fixed Greg. I'm doing what any wild creature would when
cornered with danger and abuse. I appreciate your advice, but start dealing it out to the
people who attacked me too. Because from where I'm sitting I don't see you on my side
or defending me. All you're doing is telling me how to be a better person. Please start
using that rhetoric on the people who brutally tore me apart. Thanks good talk Greg.
Two things here, Heather:
1. If you go digging through old board posts (I don't blame you if you haven't done so, it's not exactly a fun pastime, and I'm sure you've got a life outside the zone), you will see that I've had well over half a dozen run-ins with Cody on similar grounds that I've mentioned here in this thread. I have come to the conclusion that Cody understands my point, but largely rejects it. I cannot stop him doing what he's doing. He already knows I disapprove, or if he doesn't, he's an idiot. Frankly, my disapproval on that score means little to him.
You, on the other hand, I thought I had a chance of getting through to. I focused on you for a variety of reasons. You appeared to be hearing me out. You appeared to be willing to accept you might've misstepped. Your last post makes me want to do to you what I've done to Cody in specific instances (to wit, stop bothering to try and fix things).
It should also be said that in about 94% of cases, I actually get along with Cody. I might not like the way he comes across sometimes, but I respect the fact that he'll usually research stuff before making claims, and he'll usually try and help in a case where a poster really needs it.
You, Heather, I have little to go on. You're big on passive-aggressive behaviour, you've obviously been hurt (and I sympathize, I really do), and you don't want to be kicked unduly. I can understand some of that. Really, the only thing I've been trying to do is tell you that there are better ways to do this. I'm not trying to make you be silent, but am instead trying to get you to consider your words first.
2. You're not a wild creature, you're a human being. In this topic you were attacked, but I'd hardly call it being brutally torn apart. Please don't snarl at me and tell me that you respect my opinion in nearly the same breath. If you don't care about my friendship or my opinion, that's cool, but you're acting as if I've wounded you or put your back up.
All this is to say you're sending all kinds of mixed messages. I no longer know how to read you clearly, and I'm not really inclined to try. I will say that you're essentially incapable of doing me any harm, and any threats about what'll happen if you're pushed don't work on me. I will, however, endeavour not to push you. I'm trying to advise you, not bully you. Whether or not you see that will determine what happens in future.
And sorry for the side-track, folks. I will let this topic either die or evolve as it will, from here on out. Barring further developments, I think I'm done here.
I will close on one note. Can we all please remember that personal attacks and condescending language do absolutely no good, and can do all kinds of harm? Sometimes, being the bigger person means realizing that an attack is absolutely groundless, and thus ignoring it. Sometimes it means taking a few minutes to reason out a response, if you think you should use one. Being the bigger person is not something anyone can insist upon, of course, but I cann tell you this. If your aim is to amuse yourself or others at the expense of someone else, that never, ever qualifies as being the bigger person.
Ok, you've threatened me several times now heather. So here's my challenge,
stop saying you'll do something and just fucking do it. I'm inviting you to act
upon your threats. I won't lash out, i won't hit back, I won't do so much as put
you on ignore, but I want to see what you've got. You talk a big game, now lets
see some action. I want to, if I may use this frankly stupid phrase, taste some
poison. So come on kiddo, give me your best shot. Tell me exactly what you're
going to do to mess my life up so bad, so that everyone here can see you do it,
and then do it. Don't just talk about it, don't just mouth off like we're still on the
playground, grow the fuck up and actually do it for once. Cuz I don't think you
can. I don't think you have any ability to do anything at all. I think you're
nothing but a scared, angry, immature child who finds solace in fantasy books
where people are powerful and can wield magic spells and swords and things
you'll never have. I think the only recourse you have is to fall back on those
comforting fantasy books, and so you throw out phrases like "you'll taste
poison." Its no different than if you told me you'd avada kedavra me, or use the
immperius curse to make me your slave. I'm not threatened by imaginery
things Heather, so prove to me you're threats aren't imaginery. Or else, if you
can't, shut the fuck up.
All right sorry Greg I didn't know your history with Cody. I just want this to stop Greg. I'll
admit I brought it upon myself, but I'm disgusted by what this post has brought forth. I'm
tired of fighting, and you're correct in you are getting through to me. I am listening to
you. However, I agree with you this post needs to end ASAP.
Heather, please take this from someone whose oppinions have been rather unpopular around here. Mocking the mocker only perpetuates inflammation of mind and heart. And being passive aggressive? it never fixes anything. Ever. This has really gotten out of hand. Heather, I've been on the giving and receiving end of what you are experiencing (and I'm mail for what that's worth), and it's horrible for everyone. I also understand we all need a good anonymous - or at least pseudo anonymous - rant now and then. I’m not saying that some people around here don’t take their mockery of some people way too far, because they do, and for adults, I find it somewhat shameful. But you can't honestly be surprised by some of the reactions you've gotten in the beginning. It's far easier for people to ignore topics they don't agree with, but for the people who don't, it's far more fun to stir the pot. And there are a lot of bored people on the internet. Unfortunately how we choose to rise to the bait goes a long way into determining future reactions and interactions. I’m not saying you shouldn’t defend yourself from barbs both witless and witty, but Unfortunately, though it might make you feel good on a certain level initially, spewing forth your venom like a serpent which has been cornered and brought to bay is going to do the very opposite of fixing the situation. I know some people here can be hardasses; I and my oppinions on things have been challenged many, many times on this site – but you don’t do yourself any good by reacting with toxicity. Whenever I feel like I need to react to defend myself from criticism or challenge on here, I try to let my mind cool down a little before replying. Doing so with a hot temper? Well, if I may be honest, this is the usual result. Now your feelings are hurt, your hackles are raised, and your very ability to cary out any dark plans have been mockingly called into question. Meanwhile the opposition is going to be just as happy seeing what you’ll say next. It’s always nice to one up someone and have the last word. But in situations like this; with tempers flaired and grinning mockery in full swing, last words do not come easily for anyone. And I’m not saying you’re necessarily in the wrong for wanting to defend yourself. Whatever your past dealings on here have been – and I don’t know you from Eve – some of the responses you’ve received were highly unwarranted. Though actually, Cody and others have been pretty restrained all things considered. And finally, amidst the chaff, there are grains of wisdom. And not everyone you have bristled at was out simply to get a rise out of you. That is my unsolicited advice for the day; to be taken or left as you see fit.
"Stop it."
-Donald Trump
Hey Remy first off I really like your name. Second of all I agree with you. I don't want any last words. I just want the ending to come now. I am through trying to get anything across with people who call me out for not behaving like an adult when they do the same thing. I don't want to play with adult children any longer. As I've said before I KNOW they do ot have any type of problems limiting their bodies from thinking at this time. When I get stressed out from people berating me for just ranting it stresses me out, and stress raises my cerebral spinal fluid. I don't know aabout any of the rest of you wise fools, but I have had seven lumbar punctures, and I foresee more in my future. I don't have the mind nor energy to play with people who want to use weapons as words before I open my mouth with uninformed opinions. I am sick, and unlike the rest of you I have a Python wrapped around my brain at the moment. So please stop commenting on this status. As Rascal said STOP IT!!!! FUCKING STOP IT!!!!
Heather, I don't know you from Eve, either. All I can say is this. Yeah, I've been played by guys on this site in the past. It is pretty horrible. That much I get. But creating a public board about it on that same site, in the hope that your target will read it and know who they are, is not going to help. I understand the need to get it off your chest, but that's best done with someone completely unrelated to the Zone, or, if another Zoner, then off the site, or in a private QN or private message. This board does nothing to gain you sympathy, it actually only gains you exactly what it already has, which is mockery, derision, and the reputation of a drama starter that no one can take seriously. If you really do want to have it out with the person who upset you, and as others have said, it clearly is an individual, then by all means go have it out with them..in private.
I just think if you want to rant, do it.
After you rant, don't give a damn about what replies you get.
Smile.
There are sure a lot of judgmental people commenting on here. How about some sympathy, or at least empathy instead of all the condesention and lecturing?
Thank you Wayne and Bill.Hugs both of you. Most of you extra terrastrials who've
probably never seen a thing couldn't walk ten minutes with the Python I live with
frequently. Go keep bettering yourselves since you're so mature, and leave me the fuck
alone. Unlike most of you I've had the guts to tell my crushes I'm interested in them.
That's why I miss the one man who wasn't a back stabbing, money hungry, selfish person
who played at being passive aggressive way worse than myself. When you get the faery
tale, and your soul mate is taken to the grave from you you'll never have a clue what I go
through not having him.
A python wrapped around your brain? huh? Okay then. LOL
This site is such great entertainment, first thing in the morning.
right? who needs television
Wait, we're aliens now? When did that happen?
She's being metaphorical, guys. Seriously. And while some of the imagery and diction is less than ideal, there's still definitely some metaphor happening here, so leave off.
Do want to point something out though, Bill. I hear ya regarding the judgment thing. And I'm also inclined toward at least a little sympathy for someone in serious distress of one kind or another. That doesn't mean they get a free pass, but it does mean that their distress can't simply be ignored, forgotten or otherwise swept aside. I know how I can get with a modest-going-on-serious headache, or when my gut is acting up more than usual, and this sounds considerably worse, so I'd be a bit of a hypocrite to hold Heather to some higher standard that doesn't apply to me, or to other people. That said, however, I'll point once again at the "not a free pass" sentiment. One might be in a ton of pain, one might not thusly be choosing their best words, but one still has to choose how one interacts with the wider world. Frankly, if I'm going to be bitchy because I'm in pain, I go away for awhile, read a book, curl in a ball away from people if I think it's going to be that bad. If I have no choice, I try very hard to hold my tongue if sharper sentiments want to cross it, but I don't always succeed.
All of this is to say two things:
1. Sympathy for the big picture has been in fairly short supply in this thread. Bill's right.
2. Even were that sympathy to be shown by some, the facts are still basically the facts. All that happens is that people not showing sympathy look like ten times the jerks they otherwise would.
I think sometimes it's very easy to forget, when you see something really ridiculous or amusing or preposterous, that there's a real live person sitting there typing all that stuff out. A real live person who has their own faults, worries, insecurities, and daily stresses which will doubtless colour both the things they say and the things they see. I've learned a lot about this in the last few years - I had a very good person to learn from - and as such, I've tried to sculpt my own word use and phrasing around it. I don't know how well I've succeeded, but at the least I know I haven't failed outright.
Call this passive-aggressive if you want. I don't much care.
I do wish people would consider others a little more. I do wish people would remember that each and every one of us deals with things differently, with differing levels of maturity. We all are going to make mistakes, say things we later regret. There are no exceptions. It is not how well you succeed that defines you, but instead how well you react to adversity or failure.
As such, Heather might not get a free pass just because she's going through a lot, but neither do the rest of us who came down on her.
A piece of advice I got from a friend of mine a few months ago really resonates well here. I've had to apply it to myself more than once.
"When involved in an argument or discussion with one or more people, never forget who those people are. Who they are will define what they see and what they say, just as it does you. Depending on which arguments or points you try to raise, you may be intellectually validated and still be wrong in the context of the discussion. You may bring up valid points which are rock-solid within their own logical bubble of existence, but which when put into the larger discussion are not nearly so important. If you want to argue points versus points, it is best to establish this before the debate begins; otherwise, there is bound to be miscommunication on one or more sides."
Hugs Heather.
Greg, and bill by extention. If she'd made a board post about how her head
was killing her, and how she hates it, and how she wishes it would stop, I would
have said precisely zero. To support this, I'll direct your attention to the
idiopathic board, where she's says exactly that, and I say precisely zero. That's
not what this board is about though. This board is about her passive
aggressively throwing darts at some two dimentional guy none of us know in
the guise of asking people questions about whether or not they can comiserate.
Then, when called on the fact that she's acting like she's in middle school, and
not in her middle thirties, she then fell back on the pain thing and how she
wasn't choosing her words correctly. Funny how she was able to choose her
words pretty damn well when she first made the board post. She hasn't even
tried to defend them.
So, no, there is not a lack of sympathy, because I haven't said thing one
about her pain or her physical disability. we're all disabled, it would be
hypocritical to condemn one another for it. All I did was point out how silly it is
to make this board post, and how silly it is to threaten someone with a phrase
you gto from a fantasy novel.
Cody, reread Gregs last post and consider his point carefully before responding again.
I did, and I agree with him on many things in it. I agree she's being
metaphorical, at least about the python thing. I always got that, that's why I
haven't said anything about it. Others have, but I haven't. I got it as what it
was, a metaphor. Granted, its a nonsensical one in this instance, since it had
nothing to do with the rest of what she was saying, and came entirely out of left
field, but I got it.
The aliens thing I didn't get. That's not a metaphor. If I called you, bill, a
goose, I'm not being metaphorical. If I said you have the neck of a goose, then
I'm being metaphorical. But that ain't what she did.
Anyway, I'm not going to sit here and parse out every detail of wha she said,
because what she said never makes much sense. She doesn't put any thought
into her words. She just lashes out like a child and says whatever pops into her
head at the time. But what I will say is that those of us, or at least me, who
have called her on her bullshit here are not unsympathetic to the fact that she
has a condition that causes pain. That must suck hard. But that doesn't mean
she gets to use that as an excuse when she's a childish asshat. If she is in pain,
she shouldn't post. Mature people know that. They know when they aren't going
to be good at socializing. That's why I know when to walk away from
conversations. I'm sure you do as well. I'm sure Greg does. This woman, who I
feel I should repeat is in her middle thirties, has apparently not learned that
lesson yet.
Cody you have always torn into me since day one. I'm no longer arguing with you because
honestly like he said I don't deserve a free pass, but you don't either. For some reason
you don't understand you acted equally immature. Unlike most people you just can't seem
to suck it up, and be nice to me. Yes I created this board, and yes I shouldn't have done
it, but I have been trying to end it. The Python may be a metaphor, but that's what my
headaches truly feel like. That's why I'm asking you please cool your jets, and let this
topic go. I truly don't wish to argue with you. You and I both have good qualities they
were not shown through this topic. I'm begging you though please stop posting mean
things because right now I'm scared, and most days I just no longer want to deal with the
pain.
then stop looking at the board Heather. It'll fizzle out. If you're scared, go
away to a safe space and calm down. (I don't mean that as an insult. I mean it
quite literally.) Stop putting yourself in situations like this.
No Cody silly is not scared of the stuff on here. I'm scared by my condition. Ever had a
lumbar puncture?
Yep, I have, not fun. You have my sympathies for your condition, but it has
nothing to do with this. If you are scared, of anything, stop putting yourself in
situations you clearly can't handle. if it stresses you out to have people question
your statements on the boards, stop making statements on the boards. You're
an adult, you can't expect to be treated with kit gloves by everyone. If you can't
handle something, you have to remove yourself from it, you don't get to change
the rules to ake it fit you. You don't get to wear training wheels simply because
you can't race bikes with the big kid. You either learn to race, or you go play a
different game.
Cody you're still not understanding the meaning of letting a grudge go. Adults find ways of
simply letting go of the past. That's my soul objective with you now. You've been rude,
offensive, and immature when posting on all my topics. You won't accept the olive branch
I'm offering you. Perhaps, you should take more of Greg's advice. You're at as much fault
as I am Cody, so stop pointing fingers. I've asked you nicely to stop harassing me through
this topic, and if it continues to happen I'll go to a CL. I've told you I want this to end, and
you're not ending your side of it. So, once again I'm politely asking you to please to end
this cycle involving this topic now Cody. I don't have the energy to battle with you. Please
leave me in peace.
I'll tell you the thing the CL will heather. if you don't like it, put me on ignore.
Some folks just have to have the last word. How about we all agree here and now to end this discussion. Let this be the last post.
Not taking sides, but it is an open post.
When a person post something, they must accept the replies.
You can't claim you are sick after you post, so people must stop adding whatever the opinion is.
If she'd received positive reactions, such as, yes, you are right. This happened to me. She'd post and allow that and wish it to continue.
That isn't mean, that is the facts.
So no, the discussion will end when it ends.
Could be right after this post, might not be, but that is how it goes once you've put something up unless you slander someone.
What you say, written, or otherwise, can not be taken back.
Not arguing that point Wayne. But the subject has been hashed ad nauseum and the meanness expressed is not particularly healthy, helpful or enlightening. So, sure we can continue, but to what end? I was seeking to end on a neutral note. But, whatever.
I see that.
But, it depends on how we continue.
Suppose a girl, because that is what it require, post that she agrees here.
Now the poster will say, oh, lets talk.
Now if the poster is a male like myself, and says, people are responsible for themselves, someone might agree, and talk about that.
Now, the poster wishes the board to just die.
Smile.
On the score of bad mouthing her,sure, we can, and should continue on without that.
Disagreement has to be accepted, and that's all.
Actually Wayne I'm with Bill I want it to equally neutrally end. This honestly reminds me
of Trump debating with each other. I'm finished debating on this at all. However, look
closely to my comments after reading Greg's post. During this whole discussion he was
calm, cool, and collected. He didn't have to have a sex change to grab my attention. He
treated me as an equal, and gave me advice. So, think what you will Wayne, but until
you're fighting for your life don't threaten me. Anyways, enough has been said on this
topic. Unless you'd like to also be placed on my ignore list for showing a lack of respect
please let this topic die, and go onto other business.
Now taking bets on how many times heather says she's done debating before
she actually stops doing it.
So
TLDR
Cody makes sarcastic snide comment.
OP attempts to respond with extreme personal attacks while insisting cody needs to grow up.
Cody responds with more sarcasm
OP busts out more threats/personal attacks.
People jump in agreeing with, and disagreeing with either side
OP decides to then attack those who take cody's side, all while insisting that she's above them, more threats/personal attacks follow.
Greg gets mixed up in all this, and tries to reason with both sides to one extent or another, but the points selectively are ignored and or considered.
More people jump in and say their piece, to which OP responds in the usual way.
Then a few *men* come and support OP, and OP uses health as a reason she should be let off the hook, while still sniping at people.
Pasco, who supported OP, amused me a little by claiming that someone who'd already blatantly chosen a side in all this could end things on a neutral note.
Wayne responds saying something I actually agree with, for a change, Props for introducing some logic, BTW...
And now we're here, with OP insisting that she's above all this, while still replying/making passive aggressive comments.
OK, so you didn't like what cody did, but you could have chosen to handle it several different ways. Attacking someone while also trying to cast yourself as being above that kind of thing because your an adult just doesn't work on any logical level. You have your reasons to dislike cody. Cody probably doesn't care one way or another, as expressed by his posts. But unlike you, Cody isn't putting forth the double standard of insisting people treat him one way, while doing the exact mirror image of what the treatment being asked for.
Logically, Cody, or anyone else on this board has no reason to respond to you in a respectful way, because you're making demands, trying to back them up with threats and then still saying "Oh, look how hard my life is," All while continuing to attack people. Having a hard life doesn't just grant you the right to be able to act hypocritically. Its not a get out of jail free card. Or a please ignore/justify my flaws card. It doesn't mean that people magically lose the ability to hold you accountable for your actions.
If I decided to act in this way to you or anyone else you knew/liked, you probably wouldn't just except the defense you yourself tried to use. If I attacked Cody because I was having a bad day, He'd probably tell me when we talked about it that "It sucks you had a bad day, but that doesn't mean I should just forgive you."
Particularly when you're using all these things as shields, rather than actually being accountable to yourself and others.
Being accountable is hard, but its one of the things that actually makes a huge difference in weather or not people view you as an adult.
Because of all this, your assertions that people don't know how to act like adults or treat people with respect ring seriously hollow. Who are you to complain if you insist on fighting dirty as well. People have brought up Trump on this board and it made me think of this analogy. The argument you're trying to make here sounds a lot like politicians saying"Their are too many interest groups lobbying in our government," all while taking their money.
You've identified something you personally find to be a problem, So what are you going to do about it in future?
Cody is letting his actions speak for him. He feels no need to upset the dynamic of this contest, but you do.
So, if you honestly have a problem, be the change you want to see. Don't claim to be that change. Don't try and enforce it with threats, as you've learned it doesn't work, and that its extremely unhelpful to your cause.
Lastly,I agree with Wayne here on one particular point. You're posting a topic on a public website. As such, you should expect a wide range of opinions and ranges in communication style.
You didn't like what cody did. That's completely understandable. After all, we are all able to form our own opinions and express them.
But, rather than finding a constructive way to take the edge off the problem, of which their were many, you put the peddle to the metal and decided to respond to some sarcasm with personal attacks that weren't even applicable to the people you were attacking, for the most part. You could have chosen to ignore the comments, have constructive conversation, etc, etc...
As you yourself don't like being attacked, and tend to respond to being attacked, as you see it, with extreme force... How/why would you actually expect these methods to work out for you?
If you were intending to play hardball, as all of us are known to do online, That's OK.
But if your intent was to attempt to take the moral high ground in the situation, it was dishonest at best. No one who expressed an opinion you didn't like did it from behind a safety net. No one else came into this mess with excuses and contradictions in hand. And This is is one part of the reason why people weren't just willing to let you walk away, with some illogical excuse as to why you're actually the winner here.
If we choose to look at this situation like a wrestling match. You got beat, you got beat bad.
You're on the mat in a no DQ match refusing to submit, screaming at the ref you are touching the ropes when you're not able to reach them. Everyone can see you're in a hold you can't get out of but you. Sure, Cody decided to work this match stiff, and you didn't like that. But you can't pretend that you didn't raise the steaks by trying to pull off some illegal moves.
If you're actually serious about wanting this to end, Put your pride aside, tap out... But tap out with out excuses or pretenses. You don't have the strength or breath to take up the mic and get in the last word. You can't even point at the honor code and say "but look what he did..." Because you did it too. Considering you are the loser by any measurable method, its completely unrealistic that people will not only stop fighting you, but let you get the last word in and shit on them one more time.
And this is all particularly ironic considering the board title.
So, what's it going to be. Are you going to take responsibility for your actions, or are you going to continue crying wolf? Its a lot harder to realistically make a case for harassment when you decided to raise the stakes in the confrontation.
Cody is Cody, both for better and worse. We all have lots of different opinions about Cody.
None of that matters though, because you can't control Cody. Threats won't work for lots of reasons. You can't bully him in to doing what you want him to do, he may or may not be interested in doing what you want him to do if you ask nicely. I probably wouldn't risk it myself, considering You've probably dug too deep a hole to get out of here.
So, what does that leave you with? You can opt to change yourself. You can opt to do the hard work, use this situation as a blueprint for both what you did wrong, and what you did right. Be productive, not Distructive. Maybe next time, if you opt for that path, you'll have better luck in getting the results you want from people.
I'm willingly to tap out honorably. I'm definitely in the wrong. I just no longer fight with
anyone. I'm sorry for behaving badly. Now can we please all move on? I'm sorry for
attacking everyone especially you Cody. I had no right to say what I said. Please this will
not be an issue in the future. If no one forgives me I understand it, but I'm trying to do
the right thing. I respect what you had to say with you James, and I agree with you.
Thanks for the speech I will do my best not to let everyone down again with my negative
behavior.
Apology accepted.
She'd already kinda said this, for the record. This speech of yours, James, would've been a little more poignant if delivered a few days ago. At this point it feels a bit like beating a dead horse. The topic was already nearly dead, most of the harm already largely owned and accepted.
That said, I'll not do the aforementioned horse any further dishonour at this point.
For the record James, not all of us believe is playing hard ball on line. Some of us believe in arguing with respect.
I hope you learn from this, OP, because let me tell you something: I too have serious health issues (Rheumatoid Arthritis, a systemic auto-immune disease that when it attacks me, it attacks my entire system and leaves me completely dependent on others, as well as a brain condition that when it strikes, is a life-or-death situation). However, I never ever use any of those things to give me free passes, or as excuses--I hope you can learn to do the same, because it will really help you in the future.
Wow, this must really have upset you then Chelsea. And I mean that literally,
I'm not being sarcastic. I think that if I had any type of systemic disorder, and I
saw someone using that as an excuse, I'd be fucking pissed. Its like, I imagine,
the blind people who use it as an excuse to be a dick, or to be helpless when
they're not. It pisses me off. I imagine this post was similar for you. I never
thought of that. My hat is off to you Chelsea.
It does upset me, because I sometimes really have to bust my ass to get things done, but I'm doing what I can to better my life. It's been a long time coming, but I am just grateful to be alive and have a voice for things that matter. Needless to say, when I see people like the OP who act childishly when she doesn't get the response she wanted, it makes me think that she's probably just crying wolf because she likes hearing herself talk (or hearing a screen reader read the words she writes). I have no sympathy whatsoever for that kind of behavior. Call me a bitch, or whatever name you want, but I felt the Op's posts were important enough for me to say something here.
I forgot to say that I also have herniated discs in my neck, back and rib cage, in addition to the things I've already mentioned. Does that fucking suck at times? Absolutely it does. Yet, life, including mine, goes on.
Kind of why I let a lot of things not stress me out, much. I have a condition, that causes extreme pain, in my bladder. The worst thing, is for me to stress. I figure, my life is stressful enough. So, I just pick my battles, anymore, when it's out here. And, people may think me a coward, I just figure, it's self-preservation. Laughing!
Blessings,
Sarah
Hey I'm sorry you struggle with so much. I hope you find relief for your pain. Once again
I'm sorry. I know it doesn't count for much, but I'm not exactly sure of anything else I can
offer. I truly admire your struggle, and hope you find relief, as well as happiness in each
day to come in your life.
I usually do great, till the days leading up to my procedures. I can't take anything to take some of the swelling in my joints down. But, I know the proverbial light is at the end of the tunnel. As long as I know that, I think I'm all right.
You hang in there, as well. No pain is easy.
Blessings,
Sarah
Pasco, That was why I wrote if. As in if this was what she was intending to do. I never stated with fact that this is what she was intending to do.
I've seen you act bluntly on the sight before, so I don't even understand why you're bothering to make this point. From a logical perspective, it was a complete waste of breath.
Same basically goes for what Greg wrote, TBH. The words kinda and nearly are an indicator that there was a difference that needed to be addressed. I hadn't checked the boards in several days, so sorry about my bad timing. lel
Sorry, nearly and largely Those were the words I meant.
James, you said that everyone plays hard ball on line. I dispute that which is why I said it. Sure I can be blunt. But I, for instance, do not tell others that their opinions or writing on here is a waste of breath or time. Unnecessary condesention in my view. You have rather often disputed things I write, not sure why, and in my view, you do the exact thing you accuse Heather of doing. That is just lashing out. Just my view.
Aah, sorry about that one.
I assumed you were responding to a different part of what I'd written.
And From that perspective, I think everyone online has lashed out, played hard ball, or done something that wasn't productive or respectful, including you.
That's why I found you attempting to pick at this particular issue to be a waste of time.
The point you made just didn't strike me as all that valid or honest, as I've have seen you be very much less than kind to those you disagree with in public quicknotes.
It wasn't the correct response to you acting in a way I considered to be inaccurate and Pretentious.
I could have chosen to communicate my opinions with a little more tact, even if I see a vast difference between what I wrote/the way I communicated it and a personal attack. I was writing about the content of the post, not you as a person.
I think, if I may coopt James, that the main difference between people like he
and I, and people like Bill, and certainly heather, is that James and I don't see
these posts as the people behind them. if James, for example, were to put up a
post that was idiotic, I would call him on that, as would, I hope, he if I did. We'd
then go back to our normal lives and be just as good of friends, with a bit of
teasing about that one time the other posted something stupid. These aren't
personal attacks to us. They're attacks on the idea being put forth, not the
person putting them forth. Others, Bill is guilty of this, and Heather, and many
others, see themselves as their ideas. So if I say that Heather is being childish
in this board post, I'm attacking her actions and her post, I'm not attacking her.
I don't know the first thing about her, but her post is childish. I think that's the
main difference, and why we always seem to be on opposite sides of debates.
Well said, Cody.
The only issue there Cody is a lot of people feel personally attacked by some of the words and phrasing people use. you for instance are blunt and opinionated, and are quick to point out the faults and weaknesses in what a person says, or what they believe. You may not consider that attacking the person themselves - even when you call out the actual person and not what they're saying - but a lot of people either can't or don't make the distinction. In many ways, many of us really are our oppinions. I think that’s why so many people get up and arms whenever someone challenges their beliefs or ideals. Your life experience may have helped you develop a porcupine exterior, but not everyone has had either the experiences to warrant it, or the ability to grow it. I’m sure even you may have a soft underbelly.
Well why didn't you ever voice that until now Cody? I agree the post was childish, and I
was having a temper tantrum. However, it's hard for me to distance you thinking I'm not
the same as the post. I respect you as a person, and I'm truly sorry for attacking you. I'm
sorry I make mistakes. I'll leave this sort of topic off the table from now on. I wish
nothing bad upon anyone. I just want to focus on better happier things like Christmas. I
know everyone has the right to say what they want to say, but I'd rather spend time
getting to know everyone. I enjoyed the stingray conversation the other day. I had no
idea clothing was made out of them. I hate those things.
I did voice it. I voiced it in my very first post. That was the entire point of it.
Your post was passive aggressive and the sort of thing one does when they are
in middle school, I.E childish. That was the very first thing I ever said. It was
only after that when you took the topic completely off the rails.
Heather, how many times can you apologize? I think we get your point by now, but honestly, I question whether what you say is true, based off of the fact that you continually come back to this topic after you've repeatedly said you were done here.
Now, Chelsea, right there, that was attacking the person, not the idea. When you challenge someone's motives, you are not just commenting on the post, but the person behind it. Cody, your explanation of why we so often clash has some merit. I am not guilty though, I am my ideas. If I am merely playing devil's advocate, or picking on a technicality, I indicate that. Otherwise, when I express an idea it represents me so attacking that idea, if done cruely, is taken personally. and, James, I agree that all of us sometimes get riled and say things in ways we should not sometimes. Yet, in some, I detect an unnecessary tendency to be harsh without regard to the person behind the post being criticized. If this were a debate forum, then arguing just to argue makes sense. However, most of the boards are not meant as idea battle grounds and in my personal opinion should not be approached that way.
But they are Bill, that's the thing. Everything is an idea marketplace. That's
why they call it the exchange of ideas.
Admittedly, I lost my patients. In my opinion, you were acting like a white knight again. That's not really a position I can respect.
An exchange of ideas does not necessarily mean one must trash someone elses ideas to put forth one's own. Just my view. Perhaps a difference of style.
James, perhaps, in spite of your lack of respect, the white night position, as you put it, is just who I tend to be. I'd rather defend someone being piled on even if I do not agree with them because I do not personally respect anyone who piles on unnecessarily. That is just me. You have said a person who posts a certain way must just expect to be dumped on. I really do not agree, and refute that view and always will. If you feel it hipacritacal, or not worthy of your respect, that is your choice, not mine. That is who I am and I do not apologize for that demeanor. If I choose to move to a neutral position to try and defuse a situation, that is no more to be ridiculed than Cody's professed arguing just to argue.
To quote a wonderful Musical, if you stand for nothing Bill, what will you fall
for?
The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting
different results. everybody knows that Cody can be critical. Nothing has changed about
that in the last four years. Or more. everybody knows that this website has a lot of
judgment on it. And everybody knows that making passive aggressive post is stupid, but
yet we still do it. stop doing it unless you want the same kind of responses to continue
coming up. I posted a few of them in my own time. You can look at my profile and see
that for yourself. The difference was I was 19.
I still say post what you want. Just stand up for it after.
Sort of jump in the fire and stand tall.
Defend it.
You do that, it makes you look as if you really believe in what you have posted.
If you learn you are wrong, then say so if it matters, but don't back down.
Pasco, look up what an internet white knight is.
Then you'll understand why I have an issue with much of your conduct.
For a moment there I felt like a witness at a Ku Klux Klan ceremony where they bestow titles like Imperial Wizard or Grand dragon upon their members.
Or more accurately, upon their leaders, though they also make up their membership.
James, I do not much care if you disapprove of my behavior. I am not here to please you. I have explained how I feel and think, that is for your edification only, not for your blessing.
Cody, that is a good quote from Hamilton. I agree with it. I am in fact standing for what I believe. It just does not apparently match what you believe. I think both of you just enjoy picking on folks. Kind of a sad way to get your kicks.
Don't worry. I'm not seeking to get any validation from you, or to change you. I was simply explaining my thought process.
James, a white knight is someone who will just defend a woman no matter what, for no reason at all. Regardless of her conduct or anything else.
Bill has not only provided reasons, but has also stood to challenge the OP, albeit respectfully so.
Speaking as someone who used to be a white knight in my younger days, before I knew what that word was, and before I actually learned how insulting that is to women who are just looking for respect.
Being the voice of reason, or being from a pair of generations somewhat older than the millennials doesn't make us by definition white knights.
Lol if Bill was a woman I take it someone would have to accuse me of white knighting for Bill? Us midlifers gotta stick together sometimes ... lol
I know nothing about Heather besides what she posts on the boards, so was simply commenting on what she's posted just as others are doing. I was not attacking her, but simply presenting food for thought.
Perhaps the op is coming off as desperate? My thoughts.
Maybe so, but who knows. You nor anyone else can read her thoughts, so don't really know. You just know how you interpret what little you might see here.